So me and my son were having a day out when he said “I am so exited for my birthday tomorrow can we get ice cream as an early birthday gift?” I then proceeded to grab him by his smooth silky crusty scalp and threw him out of my car which was going 70 miles per hour. After that I felt bad and did get some ice cream but I realized the ice cream shop worker was a liberal so I walked out and me and my son (now dead) went to see the hit movie morbius. After that I time traveled back in time because he said he wanted a dinosaur for his birthday and got him a trex which then proceeded to tear my torso off my body and I just put a band-aid (not sponsored) on it and I was fine.