Balloons are disgusting and should be banned (r/unpopularopinion)

They’re just plastic grenades that are (90% of the time) full of stale human breath, so they roll around limply on the floor, waiting to explode at random or in the hands of some little, oversugared gremlin.

They also make a sound *far* worse than nails on a chalkboard when handled, look completely gormless, and – when they survive – shrivel up into what is basically sphinx cat’s nutsack.

Not to mention that they are an incredible waste of plastic that kills seals and pretty much all our other beloved oceanic wildlife.

They have absolutely no correlation to ‘party’ and have only been adopted due to the relentless efforts of the Big Balloon lobby. All remaining balloons should be popped and/or melted down for use in something more humanitarian, like kink suits.

That is all.


Leave a Comment