Cave Johnson here. Friendly reminder for test subjects: Using the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device for autofellatio during tests is strictly prohibited. And trust me it’s not worth it. Not because it feels like more like sucking someone off than being sucked off. According to the science boys, sexual stimulation could introduce a confounding factor that would affect test results and you’ll have to redo all the tests again. And you won’t get any extra pay for it. This policy will be in place at least until development for the Aperture Science Dick Unsucker has finished. With the number of injuries caused by that project so far, I wouldn’t bet on it being finished this decade. As a side note, there are new openings for test subjects for the Aperture Science Dick Unsucker. The position comes with five hundred thousand dollars up front and pensions for your families should any… complications occur. Just make sure to sign the waiver first. The waiver’s a big one, so remember to lift with your legs.