When people ask me about high school, a lot of them think I will regale them of times of sexual conquest and getting in fights. Or back when a girl was a girl and a boy was a boy, and if you were homosexual you got beat up. Simple as. None of this gay shit. Back then, the definition of homo was very loose. See, there were strict rules coach put in place. Lemme explain.
The football locker room was where men became men and coach used to reward us after practice. One day during our group hug in the showers, coach came in and “rewarded us” with the head cheerleader. This bitch was nasty and would let you do anything you want to her for under $10. Good deal. So anyway she’s fully clothed and sits in the middle of the locker room shower. Now, I know what you’re thinking and no it doesn’t end like that. Instead, one of the biggest, meanest niggas I ever saw walked right up to her and squatted down. As I watched in silence, this nigga managed to squeeze out the cleanest shit i ever saw. I’m talking, smooth brown, and maybe a few pieces of corn. Laid it right across her forehead. We all laughed til we cried. And during lunch the next day we winked and smiled cus we knew we ran the school. And we knew how much fun it would be next time.
So yeah, I participated in my fair share of wafflestomps, cum fights, and maybe I occasionally gargled a ball or two. But the only people who know anything are either dead or are keeping it shut. That shit was sacred. And anyone who dared spill, got an assfull after practice the next day. I’m talking full team.