I, Morbius Targaryen, first of his name, Lord of All Westeros, King of the Andals and the First Men, Lord of the Seven Kingdoms, Earl of the Longtower, Horse of the Stables, Man of Few Words, Smoker of the Weed, Gong of the Chinese, The Big Cheese, Foreskin of the Penis, Chad of the Gym, Slayer of Pussy, Fucker of Pigeon, Conquerer of Bitches, Guilty of War Crimes, Murderer of Homosexuals, Raper of Infants, Guardian of Anal Sex, Committer of Hate Crimes, Hater of Transgenders and Jews, Arsonist of Orphanage, Sock Puppet, Writer of Fanfictions, Watcher of Yaoi, Lord of the Incels, Toaster of Toast, Eater of Pickles, Insurance Liaison, Haver of Rheumatoid Arthritis, Member of the Nazi Party, and Protector of the Realm.