It’s a me!! Chris Pratt!! (Read as Mario)

Goombas. 4 real. Looka at how she’s a lookin
at a meeee, MARIO!! I mean. Find a you a somebody dat a looks at you like a dat!! You know!? We met in Bowser’s Castle. She’s a given me amazin mushrooms, and a beautiful baby Mario. she screams my name a so loudly dat sometimes i beat the sh*t outta an entire kingdom, but that’s love! She doesn’t a help me with anything. In return, periodically, I save her from getting kidnapped! That’s the trade. Her heart is a peachy and it all belongs to me. She is a my greatest treasure right next to my Bowser Jr Upper Deck Rookie card. Which if you know super mario baseball, you know is saying a lot. It’s a her birthday in about a 6 weeks. So if I don’t save her from a da castle, I’Il just a give da mushroom okay? Love
you peach 🍑🍑


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