I’ve been diagnosed with Bad Bitch Syndrome (BBS)

It was the fifteenth anniversary of 9/11. I was in the high school parking lot throwing small pebbles at theater kids while screaming,


Suddenly I hear a “dale” echoing from the forest nearby. The rapper Pitbull emerges from the moist Miami foliage.

“Mr. World Wide!”, I say, “You finally responded to my fax messages!” (At the time, This was my only means of communication because the fat camp I was attending didn’t allow computers. The counselors were scared that we would start diddling our dangly bits to google images of full fat cream cheese.)

He glides on over to me and he whispers,


“What was that?”

He says, “You hear me, bitch, you’re a sinner. I know that you find Mitt Romney attractive”.

“And what about it, niggaaaaaa? So what if I find the human personification of a warm glass of milk hot? Now might he be the type of man that in the heat of passion is so sexually repressed that he whimpers out,


Perhaps. But that is a risk I’m willing to take. Sorry to his wife, but I don’t support other women.”

Pitbull nods, and he says, “you know what? I respect you. Because you stood your ground”.

And with that, he moonwalked back into the Miami Forest. And on that day I was diagnosed with Bad Bitch Syndrome. And I’ve been suffering ever since.

#Ive #diagnosed #Bad #Bitch #Syndrome #BBS

What do you think?

12 Points
Upvote Downvote

One Comment

Leave a Reply
  1. I have a BB heater.

    Fifteen years have passed since 9/11. I have kids On the bus

    # no good

    Suddenly, I got the deal because one of Miami’s green leaders in the jungle near Pitbull.

    “Oh my God” I said while taking my last fax. Let’s start sending knives to Google 🙂


    ###### “Lucy”


    He said you were wrong.

    “Can I see someone’s face in a glass of hot milk? Now he is filled with mystery and has lost his way.

    ###### “Inspection”

    Maybe but that’s a problem I want to talk about. I approached his wife. But I don’t feed other women.

    Load a blanket corner. “i know?” I believe – because it is instead.

    So he moved back to Miami. The day I was killed, I got sick.

Leave a Reply