TIFU by becoming addicted to fart porn

It all started last month when I went to my psychiatrist to get my antipsychotics prescription filled up.

What hit me was the ghastly smell when I entered the waiting room, as an overweight man looking like a construction worker just dropped his phone.

He smelled sweaty but as he spread his legs a brap, akin to a shotgun shot rang out. Now most patients looked at the him in horror but not me. I quite enjoyed the warm touch of his sweet and intimate shitparticles frolicking in my nostrils and my lungs.

So I farted and shat my pants in vigour! I couldn’t let myself be the weakest gasser in the room after all. For whatever reason another patient in the room almost threw up.

The nurse threw me out, that bitch. Ever since, I intentionally make appointments under fake names, pretending to be an illegal immigrant just do I can give my methane machine a good rustle in the waiting rooms and in public transport.

I’ve heard from a friend that the cops are looking for me, but I swear I wont budge! Only my meatflaps will!

I never saw my psychiatrist again, I simply didn’t need to, afterall I now was happy.

Tldr: Found a liking to fart where people can’t escape from me


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