Washing your ass in the shower

It might be me being a hick that’s out of touch with modern society…but what’s the point of taking a bath/showering if you aint gonna wash your ass?

My cleansing “philosophy” is simple; it’s not some zen ritual designed to align me with the universe and clear my mind of negative energies through fragrance and water.

I’ve gotten dirty, and some of me stinks. So, I’m going to go have a bath/shower for the sole purpose of cleaning that which is dirty, and deodorizing that which stinks. It’s not a ritual, it’s a job and I **will** be judged on my performance each and every time I perform it. I wash everything else first, including my Masculine Recreation District. Then, I soap up the washcloth, reach back and delve into the Waste Disposal Region, and scrub like somebody used it to take a great big stanky dump. Top of crack to the district line entering the MRD.

It’s a forceful eviction of anything and everything living back there that’s been stinking up the neighborhood, and if they die, they die. I’m not trying to scrub hard enough to draw blood, but I’m definitely striving to do the best job I can. Even one failed eviction is a total fail. (If you’re 99% done, you’re still 100% unfinished. Never forget that.)

Really, and this may represent me poorly, but 75% of my bathing process isn’t for fun, leisure, or daydreaming. If I weren’t going to do the best job possible, just knock off the visible dirt off my face, hands, and arms…I wouldn’t bother. I’d handle that in the sink. The purpose of a shower or bath is to make stinky parts unstinky. If that’s not the ultimate goal, why bother?

No, you’re not abnormal. You wash your ass, and those around you surely appreciate it. Among friends with history you might squeak a fart out and be cool, but nobody wants to be near somebody who smells like they’ve either had a fart that brought a friend, or haven’t washed their ass since the majority of cars still had windows you had to wind down with a crank handle on the doors.

We live in a society, washing your balloon knot and the surrounding area is the price of participation.

#Washing #ass #shower

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  1. It might be me being a hick that’s out of touch with modern society…but what’s the point of taking a bath/showering if you aint gonna wash your ass?

    My cleansing “philosophy” is simple; it’s not some zen ritual designed to align me with the universe and clear my mind of negative energies through fragrance and water.

    I’ve gotten dirty, and some of me stinks. So, I’m going to go have a bath/shower for the sole purpose of cleaning that which is dirty, and deodorizing that which stinks. It’s not a ritual, it’s a job and I **will** be judged on my performance each and every time I perform it. I wash everything else first, including my Masculine Recreation District. Then, I soap up the washcloth, reach back and delve into the Waste Disposal Region, and scrub like somebody used it to take a great big stanky dump. Top of crack to the district line entering the MRD.

    It’s a forceful eviction of anything and everything living back there that’s been stinking up the neighborhood, and if they die, they die. I’m not trying to scrub hard enough to draw blood, but I’m definitely striving to do the best job I can. Even one failed eviction is a total fail. (If you’re 99% done, you’re still 100% unfinished. Never forget that.)

    Really, and this may represent me poorly, but 75% of my bathing process isn’t for fun, leisure, or daydreaming. If I weren’t going to do the best job possible, just knock off the visible dirt off my face, hands, and arms…I wouldn’t bother. I’d handle that in the sink. The purpose of a shower or bath is to make stinky parts unstinky. If that’s not the ultimate goal, why bother?

    No, you’re not abnormal. You wash your ass, and those around you surely appreciate it. Among friends with history you might squeak a fart out and be cool, but nobody wants to be near somebody who smells like they’ve either had a fart that brought a friend, or haven’t washed their ass since the majority of cars still had windows you had to wind down with a crank handle on the doors.

    We live in a society, washing your balloon knot and the surrounding area is the price of participation.

  2. I may be relieved from communicating with modern society… But what’s the point of taking a bath or watching if you’re gonna wash your ass?

    My purification philosophy is simple, not a ritual designed to align me with the universe and clean my mind from negative energies through uterus and water.

    I’m getting dirty and some of me stinking, so I’m gonna go get a shower/spirit for the sole purpose of cleaning that dirty, and remove that stink. It’s not a ritual, it’s a job, and I’ll be judged in my performance every time I do it. I wash everything else first, including my rescue district. Then, I go up the washing machine, go in and inspire them to the dump area, and shit like someone used it to take a big prank. At the top of the crack to the county line, get into a supplier.

    It’s a powerful package of anything and everything that lives there was refreshing in the neighborhood, and if they died, they die. I’m not trying to crush enough to pull blood, but I’m definitely trying to do the best I can do. Even one of the failed evictions is a complete failure. If you’re doing 99%, you’re still a 100% unfinished attachment. Never forget that.

    Really, this might be a bad thing for me, but 75% of the shower isn’t for fun, entertainment, or vigilance dreams. If I’m not gonna do the best work I can, just cut the visible dirt off my face, hands, arms… I won’t bother to deal with it in the sink. The purpose of the shower or the bathroom is to make the dirty parts dirty if that’s not the ultimate goal, why bother?

    No, you’re not unnatural. You wash your ass, and those around you certainly appreciate it. Of history’s friends, you might shake a shrine and be cool, but nobody wants to be close to someone who smells.

    We live in a society, washing your balloon knots and surrounding area is the price of participation.

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