A lonely wife went to a pet shop

She walks in and says: „My husband is at work all day. My two daughters are adult and have moved out. I am so lonely, I want a companion.“

The clerk says: „We do have a talking parrot here but I have to warn you: The parrot lived in a brothel before we got him. He knows some rude expressions.“

„Oh a talking parrot would be lovely“, the woman says and brings him.

She arrives at home and the parrot says: „Ah, a new brothel and a new madam!“

Later in the day her two daughters visit her. The parrot says: „Ah, a new brothel and a new madam! And new whores!“

In the evening the husband arrives at home. Parrot: „Ah, hello James!“

What do you think?

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  1. An old lady goes to buy a parrot. The prices are $100, $200, and $15. ‟Why is the last one so cheap?”

    ‟Oh she used to live in a brothel,” the salesman says. But the old lady can not pass up such a good deal and hands over her $15.

    All the way home the parrot is squawking. ‟Rawk, do me big boy. Rawk, half price for sailors. Rawk, spank my ass and pull my feathers.”

    ‟Goodness gracious,” the old lady says. Seeking guidance she consults with her priest.

    ‟Ah I know just the thing,” he says. ‟I have two parrots who recite the rosary day and night. Bring that naughty girl around to meet my boys and they will straighten her out!”

    The old lady brings her dirty bird to the priest’s house and there are his two parrots solemnly reciting the rosary just as the priest said. Her parrot takes one look at the two of them and she says ‟Rawk, let us do it humie style. Rawk, put it in my beak. Rawk, two for one sale.”

    The one male parrot elbows the other. ‟At last, our prayers have been answered!”

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