An old grandma is taking care of her grandson for the summer before he leaves for university.

One day, the boy brings a male friend home, seeming to be very secretive about their activities, but the grandma surmises the usual. It is fair that they are secretive, as her son and daughter-in-law are peculiarly homophobic, she’s sure she didn’t raise him like that, but she wishes to tell him that she supports their relationship. In a discreet and proper way, of course.

The summer keeps going and the boys keep at their secret trysts, but the grandmother fails to find a way to tactfully mention that she can occasionally hear them at night. She does, from various context clues, pick up that his boyfriend, from his high school and going to university with him, is most likely the top, although she tries to not think about that.

Towards the end of the summer, her grandson seems especially interested in his appearance one night. She thinks little of it until she hears a ring at the door and lo and behold, there is her grandson’s boyfriend, similarly well-dressed. She has to have a talk to them about their subterfuge, she’s astonished that her son and daughter-in-law haven’t figured out yet.

Unthinking, she blurts out a shout upstairs,* “Johnny! Your package has arrived!” Johnny comes downstairs, waving to his boyfriend and seeming confused. “What did you mean about a package? It’s just Steven.”

She shrugs. She’s been trying to do this tactfully for a while, and it hasn’t worked, so it may as well be done tactlessly.

“Because he cums in the male.”

What do you think?

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