In the days of the old USSR an American and a Russian are arguing over who has the most freedom

The American starts by saying, “If I wanted to I could undo my zipper and take a piss in the middle of the day right on the front of the Statue of Liberty.” The Russian replies, “That’s nothing. In mother Russia I could go to Moscow, drop my pants and take a dump right in the middle of Red Square.”

Many vodkas later the American finally admits, “If I wanted to piss on the Statue of Liberty I would have to do it at three in the morning around the back when nobody was looking.”
The Russian says, “I have to make a confession as well. If I wanted to take a dump in Red Square I would have to do it with my pants up.”

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  1. Nice! I thought this would be Reagan’s famous joke:

    >An American and a Russian are talking about their countries. The American starts to brag; “In my country, I can walk into the Oval Office, slam my fist on the president’s desk, and say “Mr. President, I don’t like the way you’re running this country!”
    >
    >The Russian appears unimpressed and says “We can do that in my country.” The American says “Really?” Mhm.” says the Russian. “I can walk right into the Kremlin, slam my fist on Gorbachev’s desk and say “I don’t like the way President Reagan is running his country.”

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