To whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office, I WILL find you…

You have my Word.

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  1. I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you’re looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of Office skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my Office go now, that will be the end of it. I will not look for you. I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will condemn you to the Blue Screen Of Death .”

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