When I was 10 years old my goofy ahh uncle tried to get me to touch his weenie dude!
My mom caught him and beat him with a pan.
I created an explosive bomb and put it in my sister’s lunch box, and blew her to smithereens.
I put Viagra in my goofy ahh uncle’s drink and he tried to do bad things to me.
I drowned in the bathtub when I was 15 years old.
I sold my grandpa’s crutches and he fell down the stairs and broke his back. OHGREATHEAVENS!
My dad gave me a knuckle sandwich full force. OHSHIT!
Hey! Quandale Dingle here. I just escaped prison! I am staying at my friend Juandale Pringle’s house. As I was running away from cops, I fell and scraped my foreskin off. A guy named Garfield Jenson bent me over in the shower while I was in prison. WHATAREYOUDOING! My baby mama Shaniqua Anderson told me to pay child support, so I gave my baby to creepy old guys.
My crazy ahh uncle watching sis loves me and inappropriate stepmom videos in the bathroom. WHATAREYOUDOINGSTEPMOM? I put a fork in the electrical outlet and blew my hand off. My brother, Linguini, put liquid laxatives in my grandpa’s dentures. He shit his brains out! OHGOODNESSGRACIOUS!
#quandale #dingle #copypastas #typed #care