How do you make friends outside of work in your 30s?

How do you make friends outside of work in your 30s?

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  1. You can make friends through your friends. Meet your neighbors and people in the community.

    But even better, join something! Join a club, a group, an org. Like a yoga class and then talk with the patrons. Or a car meet-up and chat cars with the people there. Or a hiking group. Or a cooking class. Or a political activism group. Volunteer. Whatever the fuck.

    Join a group, go to the meetings, get involved. You’ll meet people, and more importantly, you’ll meet the same general group of people at each meeting, over and over again. This is critical.

    Why was it so easy to meet friends in school? Because you saw them every day. It’s easy to over time get to know them and grow comfortable, without FORCING a friendship or being too aggressive in trying to be a friend. You can let it happen organically. So join something, go to the meetings regularly.

    Also, there is the adult social club that is the bar scene. Go to the bar, chat people up. Most people go to a bar expecting to socialize, so it’s easier to break the ice while next to someone at the bar or jump in on a group that’s chatting.

  2. it’s hard not gonna lie.

    Go work out, go to the gun range every weekend. go buy a motorcycle and ride any chance you get. Some where during one of these times you ” MIGHT ” meet someone you’d like to mutually hang out

  3. Volunteering is a good one. Gyms are good, too. Meet someone through some kind of regular daytime activity, and then meet their friends out at a show or a bar.

    Working together is one of the best ways to bond with strangers.

  4. It’s not easy. And if you don’t follow some of the better advice in this thread it WILL get harder in your 40s. You hafta make an effort. Find them, because they won’t find you.

    Well..they will find your exquisite corpse.. two months after you died. But you can change that. Make an effort.

  5. Does anyone else have a phobia for friendship commitments? I used to have a friend group but they eventually became emotionally draining. I used to enjoy their company when we were going through the same things, but now that we’re on different paths in life, I grew to see hanging out with them as social commitments, driven only by guilt if I don’t attend stuff. In recent years, we’ve went our separate ways in different parts of the country, and I don’t know whether I should be actively trying to form a friend group again. I found that I am pretty satisfied with just me and my spouse, and actually enjoyed the lack of social commitments during the pandemic shutdowns, and I like having the ability to do whatever I want at home.

    Whenever I meet a friendly person though, there is a part of me that wonders whether I should try to make friends again. However, I have been very happy without one that I am scared to upset the balance.

  6. Hobbies. College was easy because you’re in such a concentrated area of your peers. When I moved away and started fresh, pickup basketball helped. Meeting people at bars hardly worked for me.

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