Redditors who grew up in abusive households, when and how did you realise that your family wasn’t “normal”?

Redditors who grew up in abusive households, when and how did you realise that your family wasn’t “normal”?

What do you think?

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  1. When my funny stories were met with sympathy rather than laughter.

    I’m like no no no I’m okay now! And they’re like, James you were abused.

    Guess I use laughter and humor as a defense cause I sought closure about my abuse and was told to “let it go” which translates to no real relationship with my family anymore. Happy Dad? That’s me letting it go.

  2. I became homeless in my early twenties and had to stay with my mother for a time, I mentioned to my friends that she had been beating me for coughing – during this time she’d actually tried to kill me twice – they were shocked, and pointed out she was abusive.

    I was aware as a child that her beating me wasn’t okay, but I couldn’t escape and it was so normalised that I guess I didn’t fully acknowledge it was *abuse*.

  3. So I was always told to never talk to anyone about things that happened at home. I met my husband when I was 19, and he got to see what my mom was like and finally convinced me I was being abused.

  4. When my therapist said “that’s child abuse” after I described a few of the ‘incidents’ I could remember with my dad. I thought she was being over dramatic but then I started getting flashbacks and remembering more and it all just sorta came back to me

  5. Having to listen to my mum lie at the hospital about how I was hurt and having to put up with blood tests etc to find out how my shoulder spontaneously dislocated, as that was her poor excuse this time to protect my brother.

  6. When I would mention things in passing to try and relate to people and I’d get the awkward silence and side eyes followed by things like “I’m so sorry” or “are you okay?”

  7. Pretty early. I grew up in two different homes that were abusive in different ways. Seeing that individual types of abuse dont happen everywhere told me it wasnt normal.

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