What excuses have you heard for not wearing a condom?

What excuses have you heard for not wearing a condom?

What do you think?


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  1. but it feels better

    but I last longer

    I’m out. along with the store is closed or no way to get there

    I promise I’ll pull out

    There’s no point I usually break them

    I’m allergic (50/50 on that)

  2. They are worried about the condom breaking, or that they think it will decrease the pleasurable sensations they experience during sex. Some people also believe that using a condom means they are not really having sex.

  3. “I have trouble putting them on and I don’t want to look like an idiot”

    “Didn’t you say you were allergic to rubber”

    “I don’t have one”

  4. “They don’t fit” not in the way you expect, he just genuinely had that small of a slinger. If he’d just started with that maybe I’d been less creeped cause he kept avoiding telling me why. But by the time he did I just wasn’t interested anymore. I get that he was self conscious, but it was just like uncomfortable since he was so pushy about it even when I told him I don’t fuck with that shit.

  5. Recent girl told me “but I’m on pills”

    So fucking what, why am I, the man in this conversation, being shamed for being safe of more things than just pregnancy

  6. Bill Gates has embedded nanobots in the spermicide that slowly etch a nude image of Melinda on your dick in fluorescent green ink. It’s fine when you’re erect, but when flaccid it looks like Lizzo eating a burrito. It’s a total mood killer on first dates, but great fun at parties.

  7. “They’re too small, they hurt!” First of all, no they’re not, he didn’t have a giant donkey cock or anything. Second of all, I don’t fucking care, use them anyway.

  8. Had 1 dude tell me they hurt because they were too tight…id already seen his schmek and told him I wanted him to wear a condom not a put a cheerio on his meat puppet.

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