What’s a non-boring response to the question “How are you?”

What’s a non-boring response to the question “How are you?”

What do you think?

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  1. I was born with glass bones and paper skin. Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms, at night I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.

    How are you?

  2. How am I? I feel good, I feel all right I can’t complain, okay I lied, I could look maybe if I tried Feel like I could just lie down here on the street and I’d be content I feel tired now but I feel wired later on in my bed Feel like I have just been living in my head So I’ve been paying double rent I feel like cleaning up this clutter and this mess Feel like doing gateway drugs while I am sitting on the fence I feel I’ve woven my regrets into a nest, but I digress I feel all right! I’m feeling better than before If this talk was any smaller it won’t fit me anymore Yeah I feel fine, got everything I didn’t want I got paid, I got my fucking name in slightly bigger font I feel I blinked and thirty years just came and went Shit when they asked me what I’d like to be I shoulda said content I feel finer than a speck of dust but no one here relates ‘Cause when I ask ’em how they are they always say all right I’m fine I’m fine I’m fine all right, all right I’m fine I’m fine o-okay Is that all you want me to say? I’m so bored it’s always the same What’s the point of talking that way when your story’s all on your face? Hide that real portrait away, yeah good morning Dorian Grey I feel like—I feel like you are so consistent I feel like you should probly whisper me the trick to it ‘Cause I could go and change completely in an instant I’m weak, but I’m powerful, I’m fine thanks, how are you?…

  3. You can just talk about whatever you where doing before meeting that person. It’s an effective way of starting a conversation. Even if you answer something not too exiting like – “I’m fine I’ve just finished having lunch”, it probably will trigger questions like “oh great what did you had for lunch?” and so on… you know, it could be small talk but it’s a nice conversation starter trick 🙂

  4. I stopped asking this to older cashiers because they will end up slowing down and talking about their whole day and situation about how they have to watch a neighbor’s dog while the neighbor is taking care of an sick family member in another state.

  5. Better than I deserve. I’m a metal head so it’s always glaringly obvious people assume I just got done committing crimes when I say that Unless they’re really old and they just agree with the sentiment and move on.

  6. “A better question is ‘*Why* am I?’ What is this thing called life anyway? Is there meaning to it? What is the nature of being? Are we simply collections of molecules or is there a soul in here somewhere?”

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