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What’s your greatest dark humored joke that made everybody fall silent?
What’s your greatest dark humored joke that made everybody fall silent?
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What’s your greatest dark humored joke that made everybody fall silent?
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Q. How do you circumcise a priest?
.
.
.
A. Kick a choirboy in the chin.
How do you make a ten-year-old cry twice?
Wipe your bloody dick off on their teddy bear.
I take no joy in knowing this joke.
Why is Hitler better than Jesus?
Jesus gave three thousand people bread while Hitler made six million toast
What’s the worst thing about eating vegetables?
Getting them back into the wheelchair.
What’d the difference between an alcoholic and a pedophile?
>!Pedophile can still drive after 3 twelves!<
I’m forty one, you know what’s the best thing about forty one year olds is?
There’s forty of them
What is worse then a dead baby in a container?
A dead baby in 4 containers.
What did I Michael Jackson say to the little boy sitting on his lap.
“You have a singer in you”
2020: The year Kobe Bryant checked out at the right time, and took his favorite kid with him
What’s the smallest pub in the world?
The Thalidomide Arms
What was hitler’s favourite drink?
​
Orange Jews, 100% concentrated
Have you seen Dale Earnhardt’s wife lateley?
​
She has really hit the wall.
What does a baby and a potato have in common?……163 calories.
Two friends are talking on a bar. One said he went to the whorehouse the other day and they had a girl that sung a traviatta while giving you head.
Intrigued the other friend goes there and ask for the girl, they lead him to a room, it only has a chair and a night table besides it with a lamp on top of it, the prostitute comes in and tells him she is very shy so she is going to turn the light off.
The guy dont like that but he wants the singing head so he agrees, she kneels and start to suck his cock, after 3 mins she starts to sing, perfectly not muffed at all, you couldnt tell she had a cock in her mouth. The guy thinks its impossible and needs to know the trick, curiosity overcomes him and decides to turn on the lamp, the first thing he sees is an eye cristal next to the lamp…
Love this joke, because the one that tells it its the one having fun watching the confused faces and then the disgust when they realise.
8th grade, we were in student council planning our last middle school dance
Mrs. Dana: well gang let’s take recommendations what schools should we invite?
Danny: possibly presidio hill?
Roz: how about stern?
Me: what about Catherine De Mar?
Mrs. Dana: wait that’s an all girl school.
Me: uhh… yeah….
(Silence for three seconds before total chaos and laughter)
We were parting at the end of a funeral and I shouted out “See ya all at the next funeral!”
If only Africa had more mosquito nets then every year we could save millions off mosquitos needlessly dying of aids. Jimmy Carr.
Katie price and Dwight york are fighting over custody of Harvey their son. The losers got to keep him. Frankie Boyle I think.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to John Wayne Gacy?
Are you gonna eat the rest of that little boy?
If the conversation trends sexual and somebody says something about wearing a rubber or getting an STD, I usually tend to say some variation of, “I’m not worried about it, the good news about AIDS is that you can only get it once.” I’m 37 and single. If people ask why, I like to respond that my wife hasn’t been born yet.
Me and a friend were driving through a town in Minnesota that had a Planned Parenthood connected to a Chipotle.
Friend: “That’s a weird combo of businesses.”
Me: “Chipotle is brilliant though. A lot of people leave Planned Parenthood with an empty stomach.”
Some person: -jokingly- Dude, I could kill you right now!
Me: -deadpan- You’d be doing me a favor.
*Awkward, uncomfortable silence ensues*
Meant to be humorous but wasn’t received well at all. driving to a meeting and I walk in we are all there except my boss. Other manager asked where he was and I said “idk he was driving in separate bc he wasn’t feeling well, I hope he’s not passed out over his steering wheel clutching his chest on the side of the road” entire room fell silent and one manager stared at me then said “you scare me sometimes”. I have very satire humor and joke about death/misfortune often 🤷🏻♀️
“If you’d have just let me drink myself to death this wouldn’t be my problem”
The wife was not amused.