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What is the best way to remove a champagne bottle from your rectum?
What is the best way to remove a champagne bottle from your rectum?
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What is the best way to remove a champagne bottle from your rectum?
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A hospital
ER nurse here. Go to the ER now. Seriously. We’ve seen worse. Really.
Which end was inserted? The bottle neck or base? 🤔
shake your booty, make that cork pop, and shoot it from your butt like a projectile with the pressure of the fizz
What the fuck
At an ER.. I’ve seen this occur more times than I can count. Just don’t take it out yourself if it’s completely in, for the love of god.
Tie one end of a rope to the bottle and the other to a doorknob then slam the door.
Put a mouse up your rectum to chew on the cork until it releases the pressure to release the bottle, then send in a cat to chase the mouse out. Duh
OP is celebrating the New Year the right way, i see.
at a hospital
Smash it and poop out the glass
break it. all the little shards will fall out
Asking for a friend i presume
I will say but I got some questions first
Carefully
Trying to recreate 1 guy 1 jar I see.
You don’t. It’s part of you now.
Drink more champagne and do the biggest fart,good luck old chap!
another option is to tie a string to it and attach it to someone’s tow bar and get them to drive off and hope for the best
Happy New Year, I guess.
What the hell-
“Blow it out your ass”
— Duke Nukem.
Drill a hole in the bottom
Pop the cork.
Pull it out the anus
Why
What are you planning
smash it
Use a plunger, old chap.
You squeeze a surgical balloon in past it and inflate it, and then pull the whole lot out with a string.
Saw it on a TV show once.
Pop the cork
Hospital because the suction will rip your intestines out if you pull too hard.
your best option is to push it all the way in and let your stomach do the rest
RIP
I feel like that question is best answered by a doctor. Please locate a local er to ensure whoever the sufferer is may receive proper care for its removal
Don’t pull it out. Push it through.
someone must put a very long straw through your mouth, throat and gut into the champagne and push some air to the champagne. it will make create bubblea and create a force similar to a rocket.
Asking for yourself or a friend?
Unknown.
I’m intrigued but, find an alcoholic and they should remove the bottle and drink it
Slowly?
Go to the hospital
Um… fifty shades of freaks?
Put it in the bottle return machine and let the machine do the rest
Please go to the ER. They see crazy shit everyday. I think that won’t shock them.
Throw yourself in the recycle bin
Saber. It’s the fancy choice.
Why would you want to remove it?
With a bit of lube and a good time.
The ER is the only way. They won’t even be phased.